Well, I'm still waiting to hear about the job here in Vegas. I called Terrence today and told him that my plans had changed slightly and that I would be in Vegas until at least the end of the month. He said that was "very good" but that they hadn't made any decisions about the job yet. The other jobs in Florida all fell through. Plus, my last day of work was Monday. So, the plans as they stand now are to pack everything I own by the end of the month, put everything in storage, move my cats and myself to Amarillo to stay with my dad for a week or so, then move on to Florida, and try to substitute teach and get my foot in the door down there. If nothing works out by March, I'll move back to Amarillo and go through the PACE program at WT to get certified to teach in the state of Texas. Then maybe I can get a job and proceed with my other life plans. You know, buying clothes, seeing movies, and paying bills - all things that need to be done and can't be done right now. I guess seeing movies doesn't count. But it should!

What a wierd ass couple of weeks. As you may or may not know, my last day of work at Le Reve is tomorrow the 31st. I'm glad to be leaving because frankly - it's a hell hole. Lots of hostility and negative vibes from everyone. I really don't know anyone who's actually happy to be working there - we're all just going through the motions. It was easier for me because I knew I was only going to be there a few months. Ah well.

The problem arises because I still don't have a job. Now I have been looking for a stage management job since December. I have found plenty but they're all short term 6 week or so jobs scattered across the country. Or they're year round jobs that pay about 300 to 400 a week. No way can I survive off of that. And stage management isn't exactly a job whereby you could have another part time job. Not when you work 6 days a week and usually 8 to 10 hours a day. So this brings me to my current existential crisis. I have been looking for a new career for a while. Subsequently I applied for teaching certification in the state of Florida. Why you ask? Because my best friend lives there and I can crash with her for a while. Also, Texas certification only starts in April and Nevada doesn't have emergency certification at all. However, in true fashion, I just got my paperwork today that states that I am eligible. That's great - but high schools in Florida start in about 2 weeks. So, I've been applying my ass off for any last minute high school jobs in the hopes that they take any warm body that applies. PLUS I've got about 9 days before I have to finish packing and haul ass to Florida. AND I have to leave all my stuff in storage in Vegas because I don't have enough money to cart it across the country.

Also, I had an interview today here in Vegas for a head stage manager job. It sounds great - only drawback - I need to know like NOW whether or not I get the job because as stated above I'm freaking leaving in 9 days!! I really need to know whether or not to turn down any teaching jobs (if I get one) and find a new apartment out here in Vegas. And to top it all off, the registration on my car is due. This wouldn't be a bad thing except it is my mother's old car which had the title reverted to my brother James. I have been trying to get James to send me the damn title all month and he finally sends it to where I get it today. Not a big deal right? WRONG!!! Because he didn't fill it out properly so I had to overnight it back to him! He failed to get the damn thing notorized so now he has to do that and send it back to me. Meanwhile, as of Friday, I'm driving an illegal car. Nice. I'm telling you when it rains it pours. So, I have spent the whole day wasted in interviewing, ups-ing, and applying. Not packing anything of course. What a freaking mess!!!!! I just want someone to call me and say you're hired you start on so-and-so a date. Then I can make plans. I must have plans damnit!!!

A_kosmos is cool becuase:

1. She is one of the most intellectually active people I have ever known.
2. She goes after what she wants with an eye towards practicality, efficiency, and creativeness - very rare.
3. She has a huge heart towards animals and people that deserve it.
4. She manages to make anyone she is speaking to feel special.
5. She genuinely cares about her friends - and only calls those people friends who warrant the title.
6. She has managed to stay sane working and living in an academic environment. ;)

Courtesy of Steve:

1. Reply to this post if you want me to tell you how cool you are.

2. Watch my journal over the next few days for a post just about you and why I adore you. (May be more then one person to a post in order to avoid spamming everyone.)

3. Post these instructions in your journal and give your friends a much needed dose of love and adoration.

Well, after 3 months of unemployment, I've had 3 job interviews in the space of 3 days. Funny how that works. The first one was for a box office position at the Venetian casino - crappy job - about 10 dollars an hour - 40 hours a week - not enough money. Job 2 is as a Stage Manager at Le Reve inside the Wynn casino. Cooler job - about 37,000 a year - salary. Last job is as a stage manager at Seaworld in Orlando. Playing with animal friends - free beer is in the benefit package - beaches - not Vegas - about 40,000 a year.

Now, here's the dilemma. I am completely broke, and Le Reve wants me to start on Thursday. I will probably say yes. Seaworld will be doing a second interview next week on the phone. If they like me, they will fly me to Orlando to do a third interview in person. Then I would start somewhere after that (probably towards end of April). Seaworld is the job that I'm most interested in because it's something new and exciting. Plus, I would be around some friends. I am really freaking tired of Vegas right now. My question is this: How big of a dick would I be to start working for one company and then leave after about a month? My dad said don't worry about it and go where the money and the heart is. I appreciate that sentiment but I told him that I would feel guilty doing that. Then, he said that that was because I had morals and a work ethic which are two things rapidly dying out in this country. I tend to agree, but I was just wondering about other's opinions.

It's good to know that there's no such thing as debtor's prison anymore. ;)

A. List seven habits/quirks/facts about yourself.
B. Tag seven people to do the same.
C. Do not tag the person who tagged you or say that you tag "whoever wants to do it".

1. I've had to sleep with the light on every day for the past week because I can't go to sleep in the dark without thinking that there's someone in my house.
2. I'd like to make a pot of goulash but that would require going to the grocery store and I don't wanna.
3. I think my cat Ash has the most beautiful blue eyes of any creature I've ever seen.
4. I've been unemployed for over a month now, and I can't find a job which means I'm going to have to start applying at food places and offices.
5. I like to fall asleep to the sound of rain.
6. I watched 4 episodes of Flash Gordon that I had recorded and hadn't gotten around to watching.
7. I'm taking a cake decorating class in February.

I don't really know how to tag - so I tag Steve, Heather, and 5 random strangers who feel like they want to post.

86% Chris Dodd
83% Hillary Clinton
82% John Edwards
81% Barack Obama
77% Joe Biden
74% Bill Richardson
58% Mike Gravel
57% Dennis Kucinich
52% Rudy Giuliani
46% John McCain
41% Tom Tancredo
40% Mitt Romney
33% Mike Huckabee
31% Fred Thompson
19% Ron Paul

2008 Presidential Candidate Matching Quiz


Interesting, but it didn't really ask a lot of questions.

Well, today marks the first day of my last week of employment. As of Saturday, the Celine Dion show will close and I will be needing a job. It's a curious thing to be on a job quest. I really don't want to take something outside my field, but when rent is due, you can't really complain. I've got a few applications out, but it's still in the middle of the process. It will be weird spending the holidays unemployed.

Well, I'm back from my 9 day trip to Florida. I spent it in Lakeland which is right between Tampa Bay and Orlando. All I have to say is BEAUTIFUL! It was in the upper 70's and low 80's the whole time. I hung out with friends, fished, ate a lot, went to the zoo, took lots of pictures with my new digital camera (it's the first one I've owned), and generally had a great vacation. Now, I'm back at work (sigh) and dealing with everyone's crap. Oh well, I have the warm memories to keep me happy!

I just spent 3 hours going through every bit of my kitchen and cleaning it. I threw out 90 percent of everything I owned in the refridgerator and the cabinets. I completely dismanteled the interior of the fridge and cleaned it. I washed every dish, pot, pan, glass, etc. that I owned. I scrubbed the sink. I went and bought new groceries to replace the old. The only thing I haven't done is clean the stove or the floor. I'll probably tackle it tonight. I don't really know how this started other then to say that the whole house needs to be cleaned. But, I really was just looking for some breakfast and saw a lot of left overs that I wasn't going to eat. Once I started I just kept going.

I think I'm starting to freak out a little about being gone for Thanksgiving. I'm going to a friend's in Lakeland, Florida. It's right between Tampa Bay and Orlando. I'll be there 9 days, and it's the longest I've ever been away from my house. At least in my adult life. I wouldn't worry except that leaves my 2 cats at home alone. My brother has graciously agreed to watch my house and cats, but I fear that I'm turning into crazy cat lady. I know they're self-sufficient. I know they'll have plenty of food and water and litter. I realize that they're not my children. But, I still am having horrible images of injured/dead pets when I come home. I don't know if this is tied into losing my mom or if I'm just going crazy. Maybe I'm just turning into a hermit. I've thankfully had 6 weeks off from work (all paid for yeah) and other then this trip to Florida and a weekend spent in Texas, I probably have left the house about twice a week to get groceries or go to the bookstore. If I was rich right now, I probably wouldn't leave the house at all for about 2 months. I can't get motivated to look at people much less deal with them. Plus I need to start looking for a job because as of December 15 I will be unemployed when Celine Dion (greatest singer in the world) has her last show. Lame.

I'm currently spending the weekend back in Texas. I haven't been back to Texas since summer of 2004, so there have been a few changes. I'm sorry I don't have the time to visit everyone. I would have loved to go to Pampa and Dallas and say hi. I did manage to go to Lubbock, but it was a fly through trip to see my Grandmother (she's in a nursing home with Alzheimer's and I haven't seen her in over a decade. She didn't know who I was so it was kind of depressing to say the least. Sorry Shannon I didn't get to see you. Dad says hi and hopes you're doing well!)

So, I realize myself with an existential question and a realization. I don't really have a home town. There is an internal part of me that wants to relate to some town. It's no longer Pampa because I no longer have any family that live there. It's not Amarillo because it's changed too much and it just doesn't feel like home. Passing through Lubbock, I realized that it doesn't feel like home either. Las Vegas has never felt like home - merely a way station for a few years while I get through this section of life. So, I feel like the proverbial lone man in the midst of a crowd. I never realized that I was looking for that "home" feeling until everywhere that I've lived no longer feels that way.

The only solution I can come up with is to try and find someplace that feels like home. However, the only way that I know to do that is to travel. Unfortunatly, I haven't really traveled anywhere. I'm not exactly panicking over this or anything, but I guess I had an epiphany while driving around Amarillo that I don't really belong anywhere just yet. Hopefully, I'll find someplace oneday. ;)

So I just got a notice via myspace about a class of 1993 reunion that is happening next year for our 15th reunion. It's August 1-2. There's a link on my friends list to their website. They're asking for addresses and/or emails so they can send out more information. If you'd like to go there and get information, feel free. I'm a tool so'll I'll probably wind up going to the reunion anyway - mostly because it's a trip back to Texas and I can see my dad. Sadly, I only get to see him about once a year. So, if nothing else, maybe we could all get together for the weekend in Amarillo and catch up - dinner, drinks, etc.

Well, I start work tonight at Celine Dion. I'm there through December 15. Although I've worked there before, it's going to be weird this time because people are leaving and we're getting close to the end of the run. Tempers are flairing, and I just don't like dealing with people's shit.

I decided against moving out of my apartment. I'm just going to sign a 6 month lease - that will take me to March. Even though its 1350 a month here versus the 850 a month at the place I found, I crunched some numbers and it'll wind up costing the same for 6 months - once you factor in the cost of moving and packing and deposits, etc. I just can't justify signing a year lease when I don't have a job past December.

That's the only real down side to my chosen profession - no real job security. At most you get a year - most of the time it's 3 to 6 months. I really need to hurry up and find a teaching job. Not only because it's what I want to do but because I can have job security. Hello tenure!!!

I just wanted to drop a line and say "Happy 4th" to everyone. I hope you and yours have a good holiday doing whatever it is you do to celebrate the holiday. I'm gonna have hot dogs during the day and then go to work. Woo Hoo!! I get to work on the Strip on 4th of July!!!! Getting home might be a tad difficult.... ;)

Well, it's been a surreal couple of days here at Chez Barker. The first thing I did was get drunk on Saturday and hang around and watch tv with my friends. Believe it or not, it actually helped. Now though, all the arrangements are done so all that's left is going to Louisiana this weekend. It's gonna be a flash trip - fly to dallas on Thursday, travel to LA on Friday - fly back on Saturday. Her obit will be in the Pampa, Amarillo, and Shreveport paper if anyone wants to see it.

You know I just have to laugh (because I've always had a morbid sense of humor) but I find it damn funny that Mom died when she did. I work at Mamma Mia at Mandalay Bay casino here in Vegas, and there are 3 stage managers. Well guess what? In March, Jeff's mom died, Jim's mom died a week ago, and now mine. If that's not proving the law of 3 then I don't know what is. ;)

So, thank you everyone for your kind wishes. I feel kind of disconnected right now from everything (which I know is probably fairly normal) but know that I really appreciate everyone.

Luv lots,
Jenn

Hello everyone,

I just wanted to drop a few lines and let everyone know that my mother passed away today May 19th. Apparently she died in her sleep. I don't really know a lot of details yet or anything else concerning memorials, etc. But, I know that you all knew her, and so I just thought you would like to know.

Thanks,
Jennifer

I'm sure everyone already knows but Kurt Vonnegut died last night. I realize that I didn't know the man personally, but after having read a lot of his work, I do feel some small connection. If you've never read anything by him, I think you should.

So, I just got a phone call and am now the Assistant Stage Manager for Mamma Mia at Mandelay Bay Casino. Tres cool. It's a short gig - only April through August. I'm replacing someone who is going on maternity leave. But, if they like me, then I can probably fill in for them when others are going on vacation. Also, I can get my Equity card paid off, and there are a lot of other show contracts that will be up around then. Hopefully, this will lead to a real full-time job in my field. What a concept!!!

Please leave a one-word comment that you think best describes me.

It can only be one word.

No more.

Then copy & paste this in your journal so that I may leave a word about you...that is if you want.


Also, just thought I'd check in. I'm actually kind of bored tonight, but we're watching Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I found it amusing today, because they've had all kinds of 80's movies on tv today. I've watched Dragonslayer, the Last Unicorn, Night of the Comet, and Krull. It's been awesome! Sadly, I own all of those on DVD except for Night of the Comet. Good times. ;)